OPINION: Stroll on Wells beach makes me think of my wonderful late mum
- Credit: Ian Burt
By the time you read this I will have done my annual trip to my favourite beach, Wells-next-the-Sea, for my late mums anniversary who passed away in 2001.
I can’t quite put my finger on it but there is something so unique about walking and breathing in the fresh sea air at Wells beach, especially on a week day when its all quiet.
The smell of the pine trees and the sea really does give me a dose of energy and joy which seems to spring from within. All is well when I’m walking on that beach, it’s one of the places I love taking my visitors when they come to Norfolk.
The anniversary of my mothers passing used to sit heavily on me, being an only child and far away from Zimbabwe, my country of birth, I spent years searching for a way to make the day special. From lighting candles in the house to taking a day off work, I wanted my mum to know I was with her and feel she was with me too.
I found that space a few years ago walking on the nearly deserted beach in Wells on a wet and windy Tuesday morning, it was so fulfilling and exhilarating, and I now look forward to my annual walk.
It’s never easy whatever age you are to lose a parent and I feel grateful and lucky I had a whole 21 years of knowing and calling her mum. I do wish I had told her more times how much I loved her so I have made up for it with my own children and we tell each other every day how much we love each other.
The words 'mum', 'mother' or 'mummy' can be taken for granted and while you can still use it freely it feels so empty when there is no-one to call mum anymore.
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I loved my dear mother so much, she was great fun, I just wish she was still here to meet her grandchildren and share some of the special moments in life with me.
I thought it was all done and dusted until I met my in-laws and got such a warm welcome.
In my culture we relate to our in-laws as mum and dad as a way of celebrating two families coming together. As years went by it was always uncomfortable calling them by their first names as I assumed it was the norm here.
I remember the day when mother-in-law first asked if I could call her 'mum' it was a mixture of feelings, I was relieved to not call her by her name and also having to utter the word 'mum' again took some getting used to.
But I’m glad she did ask me and now the word just rolls off the tongue again. I love calling her mum and and I am lucky to have such a caring, loving and kind mother-in-law, and I do adore her after all she has given me the good man I call Mr G.
So as Mother's Day approaches I am excited to be spending time with both my mums in different ways and make the day special.
Mother's Day should be celebrated everyday really but this day gives us a chance to remind them how extra special they are, so whatever plans you are making for the special day, whether you are cooking up a real treat for them, a phone call or a card in the post, it will be special for them to know they are loved and appreciated.
Wishing all the mums and mother-in-laws out there a very happy Mother's Day this Sunday.
Anna Mudeka is a Zimbabwean-British musician, business executive and music festival organizer