Swanton Morley church is hoping to be flushed with donations

Swanton Morley Church. Picture; Matthew Usher.

Swanton Morley Church. Picture; Matthew Usher. - Credit: Matthew Usher

It is a 'relief' fund with a difference.

Parishioners and visitors to Swanton Morley Church are being asked to donate a pound to spend a penny at the 700-year-old house of worship.

The Parochial Church Council has drawn up plans to install a toilet and kitchenette in the church for the congregation at its many services and for large-scale fundraising events which will ensure its survival.

While a septic tank has already been installed and a water supply the next stage would be to install the toilet, together with a sink and storage area for flower arranging and cleaning equipment. This would replace an ugly plywood storage area in the northwest corner of the church.

The cost of this first stage will be £18,500, but at the moment the PCC is £8,000 short and has launched an appeal for any help that anyone can offer.


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During the past 11 years, over £156,000 has been spent on major restoration work at the Grade I listed church. A leaflet issued to the village says: 'We are now moving on from essential maintenance to making the church more user-friendly. This will not only help with fund-raising to ensure the future of the building, but will also benefit the village community as a whole.'

One donation was received by project officer Judy Stone this week with a poem. It reads:

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'There comes a time in all our lives,

As everyone will know

When the call of nature beckons

You really have to go.

But tell me someone if you will,

Whatever do you do

When the call of nature beckons

And you cannot find a loo!

So dig deep into your pockets

And give a pound of two

For one day that desperate person

Could easily be you!

Just one thing more in conclusion

Please accept my enclosed contribution.'

It was signed '2 - D - Loo'.

Mrs Stone said: 'We are so grateful for all donations and it would be lovely to be able to thank whoever sent this and spent some time composing such a delightful poem.'

For more information contact Judy Stone on 01362 637592 or email judystn2@gmail.com. Donations may be sent to treasurer Rowland Furse, The Farrows, 27 Greengate, Swanton Morley, NR20 4AD.

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