'I nearly did end it' - TV presenter Simon Thomas admits he had suicidal thoughts after death of his wife
PUBLISHED: 09:38 29 March 2019 | UPDATED: 14:16 29 March 2019
TV presenter Simon Thomas has admitted he suffered with suicidal thoughts after his wife tragically died just three days after being diagnosed with cancer.
Mr Thomas, who was born and raised in Norwich, was speaking at an event for terminal illness charity Marie Curie last week.
He said: “I didn’t cope very well, I’ve been to a grief counsellor since three weeks after Gemma died, it really helps me. Grief is painful whoever you’ve lost and whatever time in your life you lose them.
“I had a decision to make and there were at least two moments where I nearly did end it. My boy has been the single biggest reason I kept going.
“There is no moving on. That person going leaves a gigantic hole in your life that no-one or nothing can ever fill.
“Once you realise that, it does change things. It’s about rebuilding life around that gap. For the sake of Ethan I had to find life again. My relationship with Ethan is so much more profound than it ever was.”
Gemma Thomas died in November 2017 just a few days after being diagnosed with acute myeloid leukaemia.
She had previously been suffering from headaches, insomnia and exhaustion all common ailments which at the time, did not spark concern and were put down to stress.
It wasn’t until her headaches worsened, she could not get out of bed and started vomiting that she was rushed to hospital, where blood tests were carried out and her diagnosis revealed.
Despite undergoing treatment to thin her blood the 40-year-old died three days after her diagnosis.
The former Sky Sports presenter also revealed last week that his nine-year-old son Ethan was starting to forget everyday memories of his mother.
Speaking on This Morning he said: ”Ethan has a different understanding of death. What has been really hard for him that the everyday memories of mum are starting to fade.”
Mr Thomas, 46, had been packing inspiring notes in his sons lunch box and he said Ethan had asked whether his mother had ever packed his lunches.
Mr Thomas said: “Nearly sixteen months later the memories of mum are fading.”
Although Mr Thomas stopped working after his wife’s death, he posted on Instagram on Wednesday to announce he was returning to screens.
His post showed a recent note left in Ethan’s lunch which read: “My brave boy - after 17 months it’s time for daddy to do some work. I’m only away one night, but I’ll be thinking about you all the time.”
He posted: “So after 17 months since I last sat in front of a TV camera in my usual role (not as a guest), later today I head to Scotland to film tomorrow.
“I can’t say too much just yet about what it is and who it’s for; but it’s very different to what I was doing before.
“I don’t know where it will ultimately lead, but after many months of worrying what the future held career wise, it feels good to be going back to what I love.”
He also shared a photo of personalised giant cookie girlfriend Derrina Jebb, 27, a minister’s daughter, had given him.
Mr Thomas, who is understood to have met Miss Jebb at church and credited her for her support, said: “And something rather special to send me off to work from Millies Cookies. Thanks Derrina - you’re always thinking of others x”
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