‘I feel like I’m all by myself’ - daughter on how father’s murder has devastated her life
PUBLISHED: 09:54 03 March 2020 | UPDATED: 10:31 03 March 2020
The daughter of a man who was murdered by his wife in their home has told how her life has now stopped after her dad was killed in front of her and her brother.
Jeyamalar Kumarathas, 55, had gone on trial at Norwich Crown Court having denied murdering Kumarathas Rajasingam, 57, following an attack at their home in Burdock Close, Wymondham, on March 16 last year.
Kumarathas was sentenced to life imprisonment with a minimum term of 16 years on Monday (March 2) after a jury took less than two hours to convict her of murder.
Today, we can release the full statement made by the couple's daughter Elaxana about the impact the killing has had on her life.
She said: "My Dad is gone, forever. I managed to finally develop and gain a loving and nurtured child to father relationship, as well as my brother Jesi, and that has been taken away from us. Jesi and I have lost a caring, consistent
authority figure and a solid bond which we won͛t get from anyone else.
"Our lives have stopped and have come to an abrupt halt. My brother who no longer lives with me in the family home, has spent a long while asking for his home in Wymondham. He gets extremely anxious at any changes that happen in his life. He has stopped listening and speaking to anyone in Tamil. He͛s becoming a different person as am I. I don't have anything to do with being a Tamil person anymore.
"It's hard to be without Dad and I can no longer watch a Tamil film or listen to a piece of music that he would like as it makes me feel guilty that he isn͛'t here to enjoy it. I'͛m constantly anxious and paranoid around people since the death of my Dad. I'͛m too scared to even make a new friend because I worry that the past will haunt me.
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"Before the death of my father, I worked full-time as a teaching assistant, a job which I loved and was a big part of my life. I really enjoyed the role, but I haven'͛t been able to go back to work for nearly a year, because I can͛'t face my colleagues anymore as the incident has been all over the news. "I often have depressive episodes because I feel clueless and like a failure. I used to look to my Dad for help and support, nearly all the time. Since the death of my Dad, I have had to rely on support from the Mental Health Care Team.
"My cousin who had cancer passed away a month after my Dad. If Dad was alive, we wouldn͛t have stopped it but we would͛ve done what we could to buy him some more time to live longer. Dad was arranging my cousin's biomedical treatment because chemotherapy didn͛t work. I couldn't even say my last goodbye to my cousin as I was still mourning the loss of my Dad so much that it didn'͛t even occur to me that he would go too. To this day I still feel guilty about it.
"I am estranged from my extended family because the only common thing we had was my parents. Now that both my parents aren'͛t playing a role in my life anymore, I feel completely disconnected from them and see no actual benefits of being in touch with them. "My Mum had pushed them away from my brother my Dad and I for so long that they are not really family. Since the death of my Dad, I have been aware that I might have to give evidence about the incident and about the background of my family. I have felt a great deal of stress and worry about giving evidence in court. I have had to sit through my video interview evidence and give evidence in the court on two separate occasions in December 2019 (at the first trial) and again in February 2020. After giving my evidence the first time, I thought that I had done my duty only to find out shortly afterwards that I would have to go through the process all over again, which brought back all of my worries and I really didn't want to do it again.
As for how I feel about my Mum, that has changed too. I cannot begin to explain how many times over the years that I asked my Mum to stop her behaviour, to stop her drinking and to seek help. However, it all fell on deaf ears. Whilst Dad was alive, my Mum made me feel like I was all by myself. Now Dad has gone I still feel like I'm all by myself. Mum has had so many opportunities and chances to change. Now it's too late. She͛s taken my Dad'͛s life away.
"I don't feel any empathy or sympathy for my Mum after what she has done. In my opinion she has to face the consequences for the choices she's made over the years and for stabbing and killing my Dad."
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