I don’t think disappointment is a strong enough word to sum up our how season has ended and I’ve got to apologise again to our fans for Monday’s display.

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The difference between us and them on the day was their number nine, Conor Washington. Credit has to go to the lad for how he took his three goals, but irrespective of that we just need to look at ourselves in the mirror.

We let ourselves down because we couldn’t have asked for a better start. We went 1-0 up, even though we didn’t have much possession, but we caused problems when we hit them on the break.

But we let them back into the game by being poor defensively as a team. You have to defend as a group, from the front, and we didn’t.

After it went 1-1, for five to 10 minutes, we had to stick together, lock in, and play ugly football, but we didn’t. We hit the panic button. Certain players went hiding and we didn’t as a group show the character that I know we can. The goal on the stroke of half-time, to make it 2-1, was a real blow though.

It’s always difficult when you concede, but to let in another at a time when we needed to ride out another five minutes and re-group and refresh at half-time and go again after the break, really cost us.

We deserved to lose and I’m not one for making excuses, but the referee (Alistair Wilson) was an embarrassment. You get good refs and you get bad refs and you get calls that go against you. But to get them consistently against you all match is a tough one to take.

Stuart Wall has a great attitude. He’s such a positive person and he rarely raises his voice. I don’t think I’ve hardly heard him swear either. But when he’s asking a ref about a decision, very politely, and gets the sort of response he did, it makes things tough to deal with.

Despite that, we need to ask ourselves this though. Do we all want to play for this club? A handful of players really took the defeat to heart. I think you can see how much the result hurt Danny White, Jack Defty and myself.

The way the season’s ended has been horrible. It’s the worst three weeks I’ve experienced since I’ve been playing football. We’ve lost everything. We could have done the double and all of a sudden we’ve ended up with nothing.

We need to have a break over the summer and start again. We need to man up and stick together. The proof is in the pudding about our ‘nearly men’ tag and it’ll stick. We were nearly league winners. We were nearly cup winners.

Now, we’ve got to walk around all summer with that tag on our head. We have to take the jokes from other players, the criticism from fans, and keep this feeling in our heads as fire for next season.

Up until the Buckby defeat it had been 10 out of 10. So credit goes to the manager for how far he’s taken us. It’s just frustrating we’ve got to wait six to eight weeks to get out there again.

We deserve a bit of luck and hopefully the FA will let the club move forward to Step Four. For now I’ll go away on holiday and recharge my batteries.

The only one who won’t be taking his foot off the gas is the manager.

He’ll be on his phone for the next month or so organising for next year and I hope he’s the boss to lead us again next season.

I don’t know whether he’ll want me here, but I’m desperate for that call that says, ‘Ross, I want you back next season’. I want to be at this club. You can’t knock it. I want to pull on a Lynn shirt again – whether it’s as captain or not. I’ll always give 100pc.

• Read Ross’ exclusive column first every week on Thursdays in the EDP’s Lynn Free Press pull-out.

• Follow Ross on Twitter, or read his previous columns, by clicking on the links on the right-hand side of this page.

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